Know Thyself

I've been debating whether or not to write about this. Mainly because it really is nobody's business and people always have opinions that they aren't afraid to share whether hurtful or not. But then I decided, maybe my honestly could help someone. So, that being the case, I will tell you all something personal about myself that I just discovered.

I was diagnosed with ADD this last week. Actually, I figured it out myself. I won't get into the details of it because it involves others I love who don't want their laundry aired, but I've suspected I had ADD for the past six months. I went to my doctor and he agreed with my diagnosis (of course =))

After forty years of dealing with the frustration of being called: air-head, a ditz, lazy, and other things, I finally took it on myself to discover the truth. I also decided I wanted to try out medication since I'd already exhausted every other avenue in trying to help myself. I'm taking Ritalin SR since that's the only one I can afford.

When I was in jr. high, my parents had me tested for resource. They thought I had a learning disability since I struggled so much in school. I never got good grades. The tester came back with the results that there was nothing wrong with me. I was just lazy. I can still feel the affect of those words. It really hurt to hear that. I didn't feel lazy, but I supposed I was. After all, they had told me so.

My whole life was told I was unmotivated and forgetful. I thought I was quirky. It was just who I was. Now I know different. Thank heaven for medication that helps me feel happy, relaxed and has done AMAZING things for my relationship with my family. It's a whole new world of wonderful. The things that made me suspect ADD were . . .

"Adults with ADD/ADHD often have difficulty staying focused and attending to daily, mundane tasks. For example, you may be easily distracted by irrelevant sights and sounds, quickly bounce from one activity to another, or become bored quickly. Symptoms in this category are sometimes overlooked because they are less outwardly disruptive than the ADD/ADHD symptoms of hyperactivity and impulsivity—but they can be every bit as troublesome. The symptoms of inattention and concentration difficulties include:

• “zoning out” without realizing it, even in the middle of a conversation.
• extreme distractibility; wandering attention makes it hard to stay on track.
• difficulty paying attention or focusing, such as when reading or listening to others.
• struggling to complete tasks, even ones that seem simple.
• tendency to overlook details, leading to errors or incomplete work.
• poor listening skills; hard time remembering conversations and following directions"

So there you have it. There are other symptoms and here is a great website to research, but if anyone out there feels these things, has these symptoms, self medicates or just feels like there has always been something wrong, check it out. Don't be afraid. Don't be embarrassed or ashamed. Your happiness is worth it.