Most people this time of year are making resolutions and goals for the coming year. Lose weight. Learn a new instrument. Read the classics.
I just want to get better. Not that those other things aren't important, but it's all about perspective. I've made the goals to lose weight or to try new things many times. It's when you just want to live that your whole perspective of the world and life changes.
I want my hair to stop falling out. I want to eat something without getting indigestion EVERY time. I want to be able to wake up with energy so I can work out. I want to feel happy. We forget how hard it is to feel happy when our body feels crappy.
I have a new appreciation for people with chronic illnesses. Supposedly Lyme Disease isn't chronic, but I have friends who have been fighting it for years. I hope my story is different. I hope I can kick it the first time around.
This year, I just want to love my kids. I want to be the loving, fun, patient mom I've never been before. I want to read to them, like my mom did with me. I haven't done that with my kids. I'm always so tired. My whole life I've fought fatigue. I'm so chronically tired that I'm not even sure what it means to have the energy to get things done. I've spent my life evaluating how tired an activity will make me, balancing my days by my "exhaustedness". I want this year to be one of activity and wonderful memories. I want to go places with my family, DO things.
Here's to a new year. And here's to new possibilities. Here's to health, happiness, and family. May your new year be as wonderful as I hope mine is!
Happy New Year!
PS. Thank you to all of you who have commented on past past. Thank you for your advice and encouragement. I'm now taking apple cider vinegar pills and they help IMMENSELY! Thank you all!